by Jay H. Gorania
Metal has no rule book. Is one Disgorge enough? No, there have been two bands named Disgorge, one American, one Mexican. Canadians don’t have a rule book either. Well, the Canadian Football League doesn’t, anyway. I mean this in the sense that, similarly, there were the Ottawa Rough Riders, and barely differentiated at all as far as namesake, there is my home town (Regina, Saskatchewan) team: the Saskatchewan Roughriders. They have a big day tomorrow when they play for the CFL’s championship: The Grey Cup.
They made it to the big game last year, unfortunately losing in dramatic fashion by a single point to the hands of the Montreal Alouettes. The Riders beat the Winnipeg Blue Bombers for the trophy in 2007, and their previous win came in 1989 with Dave “Robo Kicker”’ Ridgway’s game winning field goal crushing the dreams of the Hamilton Tiger-Cats and their fans (alright, Hellbound.ca might be Hamilton-based, but the record speaks for itself. Quit crying, Sean, Albert and Kevin. Saskatoon-based Hellbound scribe Adrien Begrand has my back if y’all pull some tough guy antics).
Tomorrow’s big game is against the Alouettes once again, an opportunity for the ultimate revenge, and surely, the metal gods will lead the Riders to victory tomorrow. Real men listen to metal, and real men eat wheat. Go Riders!!!