THE RETURN OF KEVI METAL’S RIMSHOTS!

C101.5FM 003a

Those of you who were disciples to Adrian Bromley’s Unrestrained! are well familiar with Rimshots. Those of you who read Decibel (and there’s absolutely no reason not to!) may have noticed a similar, digital-age inspired endeavour entitled ‘Tweets for Twats.’ Those of you old enough to remember will notice how I ripped this idea off from Ron Quintana’s ‘Ron’s Retarded Record Reviews’. What happens is that I review new releases using two or three sentences max. Act like a wiseass and, sometimes, hilarity ensues. This will only appear when I’m motivated enough or Sean threatens parking sanctions against me.

And a-way we go…

AVULSED
NULLO (THE PLEASURE OF SELF-MUTILATION)
IBEX MOON
Fenriz will love it (“Voracious Backpacker”), your crotchety gramps will sympathize (“Infernal Haemorrhoids pt.2”) as will that quiet, unassuming library worker next door (“She’s Hot Tonight (In My Oven)).” Come for the riffs, stay for the bunghole-bursting, chick slaughtering mayhem!
[8/10]

SLAYER
WORLD PAINTED BLOOD
SONY/AMERICAN

No matter how senselessly screamy the solos get, how recycled the riffs get and how many times Lombardo quits, it’s always been Tom Araya that delivers the most frenetic performance, even while seeming totally disinterested. This band is fucked!
[7/10]

Want more Rimshots? Leave a comment and let Kevi Metal know!

Comments

11 responses to “THE RETURN OF KEVI METAL’S RIMSHOTS!”

  1. Lainad Avatar

    Kevin, you are so incredibly hot in the picture.

  2. ksp Avatar
    ksp

    huh, what? are you still drunk from new year’s eve?

  3. Lainad Avatar

    Jesus Kevin, it was a joke. You do look cute in funny sorta way – and yes, my Champagne buzz has worn off!

  4. Jay H. Gorania Avatar
    Jay H. Gorania

    more rimshots! more rimshots! more rimshots! i demand it and love it, but i don’t love you. no rim jobs, more rim shots!!…..i’m hungover

  5. Jon Avatar
    Jon

    Yes, more.

  6. ksp Avatar
    ksp

    this is metal. no room for jokes.

  7. Lainad Avatar

    Umm. Okay(goes into corner and starts to weep silently).

  8. ksp Avatar
    ksp

    dammit! no jokes!

  9. betsey Avatar

    yes, the return of Rimshots!! bring your worst ksp

  10. skullsession Avatar
    skullsession

    Ah yeah, that picture… I’m sure I’ve seen something similar to it. Where was it… hmm… oh yeah…. I think it was in “All Male Revue #6”.

    \m/

  11. MamaMoonie Avatar
    MamaMoonie

    Heya Kev…long time no see, glad to see you back!!

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